Sheep's Best Friend
by Maeve Moonstone
Summary: It is sad how few fics there are for this show. So, I decided to contribute. Established Shaun X Bitzer (Because they are SO a couple), an "intelligence revealed" story. The farmer finds Shaun and Bitzer participating in "romantic antics", and assumes the worst. What future will result from this horrible misunderstanding?


It was just another normal day on Mossy Bottom farm.

Or, at least, as normal a day as one could have with Shaun around.

But, the farmer, as usual, was oblivious to the activities of the flock and their leaders, Shaun the sheep and Bitzer the dog. That is, until he happened to glance out the window and notice the absence of said leaders. Now, Shaun he didn't notice - all the sheep were the same, to him - no, it was the absence of Bitzer that alarmed him.

The farmer, confused, walked outside and called Bitzer. Now, usually, this would get the dog rushing right behind him, scaring the heck out of him. But, surprisingly, no Bitzer. The farmer scratched his head in confusion - that is, before he heard a howl from the barn. The farmer, panicked, tried to rush over to help - he learned long ago that a howl was the canine equivalent to a human scream, which could only mean his beloved dog was in trouble - only to find his way blocked by the flock. He tried to get around the sheep, but they moved to purposefully block his path once again. This went o for some time, the flock trying desperately to keep the farmer away from the barn - but, to no avail. Eventually, he got to the barn doors, and he finally tugged them open - much to the sheep's dismay. There was no WAY they were going in there - so the flock could only hope that their two brilliant leaders could get themselves out of this one.

Inside the barn, the farmer heard more sounds - panting, barking, whimpering, and all manner of dog-ish sounds, (which the farmer assumed were sounds of pain) coming from the loft- the farmer was about to call his dog again, when he heard another sound which surprised him.

"Baa-aa-aah!"

Was there… a SHEEP in pain up there, too?

Curiosity kept the farmer uncharacteristically silent as he climbed the ladder to the loft. Now, usually, either Bitzer or Shaun would hear him clamoring up the ladder and find some way to make everything seem normal well before the farmer arrived - however, both Shaun and Bitzer were fairly… DISTRACTED, and therefore could not sense the presence of anyone else. So the farmer was in for quite the surprise.

The farmer nervously peeked over the edge of the loft floor, and gasped in horror - Shaun and Bitzer whipped around to see the farmer's face staring at them, and froze in shock.

Now, here's what the farmer saw. Shaun was lying down, mostly wool-less, back against his bed, with his front hooves pressed against Bitzer's chest. Bitzer was leaning over Shaun, paws pressed down on the mattress on either side of Shaun's head, with a mouth full of wool. Wool was scattered everywhere, and Bitzer's hat seemed to have gone missing. Overall, it was a fairly compromising position. Both animals blushed a deep red, and Bitzer looked away, ashamed. That's when the farmer snapped.

The flock didn't really know what exactly happened. All they knew was that Bitzer was chained to his doghouse the next day.

Shaun became worried, and paid his on-again off-again boyfriend a visit. First, Shaun showed concern, which Bitzer readily accepted. Then, they were chatting happily to one another. Then, they were getting on each other's nerves and laughing at each other's expense. They were arguing when the farmer showed up, and Shaun hastily hid from sight in some nearby bushes.

The farmer wasn't happy as he undid the chain and roughly yanked on it. Bitzer whimpered, and the farmer yelled at him, which made him shut up rather quickly. The farmer grumbled as he forcefully lead the dog towards the hay house. Shaun narrowed his eyes and followed them. Something wasn't right here.

As he followed them, Shaun realised they weren't going to the hay house - they were going to one of the secluded storage rooms. Shaun slipped inside after the two and hid behind a large metal milk container. He watched as the farmer shoved Bitzer inside, and pulled out something… long and metal. The long metal thing snapped and clicked into place. Shaun's eyes widened.

Gun.

Without thinking, Shaun lunged forward and tackled Bitzer out of the way - just as a bullet hit the place where Bitzer had been standing. Shaun squeezed his eyes shut, trembling and clinging desperately to a fairly confused Bitzer. Shaun felt a soft, furry paw cup his face and brush a tear away from his cheek. Finally, Shaun dared to open his eyes to meet the concerned soft brown of his lover, a question in his eyes. In response, Shaun just buried his face in Bitzer's fur, clutching him tighter as fresh sobs shook his body. Bitzer rested his chin on Shaun's head, patting his back comfortingly.

"Wha?" The two turned to face the farmer, a strange expression on his face. That's when Bitzer noticed the gun. He clutched Shaun protectively and growled at the farmer.

The farmer looked less puzzled as his face took a grim expression. Bitzer glared at the gun, almost daring the man who was once his best friend to finish the job.

The farmer cocked the gun.

And that's when Shaun did something he thought he'd never do ever again.

He stood up to a human.

Literally. He stood up to a human. On two legs, arms held out to shield his companion instead of on the ground in front of him, looking dead into the eyes of the farmer with obvious intelligence. An act which had gotten him kicked out of his last home. But at this point, he didn't really care about the consequences of intelligence - all he cared about was the safety of his family, and that especially included Bitzer.

Shocked, the farmer dropped both his jaw and his gun, arms still out as if to mime the gun still being there. The three stayed there for a long time - before the rest of the farm animals rushed in to see what all the commotion was about. They all stopped in their tracks, however, when they saw Shaun standing right before the eyes of the farmer. Timmy was the first to react, standing up and walking over to stand beside his big brother. Mama sheep rushed in to protectively hold her baby, and Shirley followed soon after to guard all of them. One by one, the members of the flock stood up and gathered around to protect their family - and then they were joined by the pigs and the hens. Even the bull stood behind the flock - pretty soon, the entire farm was standing together around Bitzer in front of the farmer. Bitzer stood up and, once again, wrapped his arms around Shaun, growling at the farmer. All the other animals followed, showing their own signs of aggression. The message was pretty clear.

The farm was not made of a bunch of stupid, easily replaced animals. The farm was a community, and each creature of the farm was unique and important. If you mess with even one creature, it means you mess with the ENTIRE farm. Especially if you mess with the two who built that community in the first place.

It was a lot to take in. The first thing the farmer felt was shock. Then, he felt intimidated. Then, finally, relief. Relief that his dog HADN'T been sexually abusing the sheep, and that he WOULDN'T have to put Bitzer down. The farmer laughed - not in insanity, but in honest joy. The animals all relaxed, and he patted Bitzer on the head.

A lot of things changed for the better that day. The animals didn't have to hide anymore - they were all free to do as they pleased, despite the farmer's presence. The farmer actually began to take part of this strange new community, attending ball games and movie nights. Mossy Bottom Farm became a sort of animal safe haven, where creatures can live in peace without having to worry about human discrimination. New buildings were set up, new creatures came to live there, and Bitzer even managed to set up a small school system. Timmy loved school, as did all the new animal children who moved there.

Shaun, Bitzer, and the farmer became the three leaders of the community. Shaun was in charge of innovation, Bitzer was in charge of management and law enforcement, and the farmer was in charge of human affairs. The three became fairly close friends, though the farmer tried his hardest not to get involved with Shaun and Bitzer's, ahem, "romantic endeavors".

Mossy Bottom Farm continued to be a historical village long after the natural passing of all the original members of the community, standing as a monument to the beginning of true animal freedom and equality.


End file.
